Do you think that loving yourself is selfish? Many of us have been taught that tending to our own needs first is wrong. The truth is that learning to love yourself is not selfish, it is, in fact, the key to a free and happy life.
Do you want to discover how to cultivate a deep sense of love for yourself? Do you long to radiate confidence and security in your life? It is so easy to fall into the trap of self-doubt, procrastination, and negativity. Once we start comparing ourselves to others we find it even harder to find self-love.
Why is it Important to Develop Self Love?
Many people do not realize how linked the law of attraction and self-love are. You know that everything is energy and vibration in this universe, so doesn’t it make sense that through love you will flow pure energy? When you feel good within you feel good about everything else too. Everything is a reflection of your perceptions, beliefs, and vibrations.
It is not selfish to love yourself first, it is essential, and we’re not talking about arrogance or telling people how awesome you are! We’re talking about accepting yourself on a deep human level and treating yourself with respect.
When you love yourself you create self-confidence, self-worth, and compassion. One of the biggest problems we all face in this age of Instagram and Facebook is about validating ourselves through the approval of others. When we are constantly comparing our lives to other peoples or have worth tied up in their opinions of us, we are setting ourselves up for misery. The answer is to have that sense of self so cemented that nothing anyone can say or do can knock you from your knowledge of who you are and what you are worth. That deep place of self-love is the starting place for all miracles!
We’re going to show you some simple ways to incorporate self-love into your life and grow your self-esteem for a happy life.
When you learn how to love yourself, the law of attraction will suddenly seem to work to your benefit much more. That’s because when you fuel your desires with optimism (because you just 100% know that you are worthy!), you allow positive things to flow to you with much more ease.
How to Love Yourself: 15 Tips for Developing Self Love
1. Train Yourself Positive
Every day write down 3 positive things about yourself. These can be anything from achievements in life to friendships you value or physical/ character traits you admire in yourself. The reason this helps is that it trains you to look for and appreciate the positive over the negative in your life. Imagine what it would feel like to praise instead of criticizing yourself!
2. Take Yourself Somewhere New
Instead of waiting for the right moment or person to come along, why not just go to the movies or try a new restaurant on your own? When you can break through insecurities you have about doing these things solo, you deepen that connection to your true self. You discover the part of you that loves who you are unconditional.
Setting off on a trip alone is a wonderful way to cultivate self-love and get to know yourself. It’s even better if you also take in a new culture or unknown destination as you will be forced to strip down any preconceptions you may have about others and yourself. Throwing yourself into the unknown is brave and takes confidence, you will find out a lot about yourself on a deep level.
Writing is a proven therapeutic way of releasing tension and negativity. It is amazing to process your feelings and emotions about yourself and your life through journaling. You can also go back and see how you worked through challenges and learned from any bad experiences.
5. Mirror Work
Every morning go to the mirror and look straight into your eyes and say to your reflection “I love you, just as you are and I want to be your friend.” You can choose your own words of course, but the effect of this is incredibly powerful. Some people may find it very challenging at first, but keep at it and feel your self-esteem and confidence soar.
6. Create a Vision Board
When you don’t love yourself you don’t believe you can have the things you want in life. Creating a personal vision board of everything you dream of is a wonderful way to get excited about your future. Why not include images of things you already have that you love and are proud of? This can help you to identify with your vision and not see it as just an unattainable dream.
7. Meditate Every Day
Meditating on a regular basis is like food for the mind and soul. We all know it by now, but how many of us actually can say we do it enough? When you get into a healthy practice of calming your mind you start to feel who you really are on a deep level and how you connect with everything else in the world.
8. Listen to Your Gut
Another benefit of meditation is being able to recognize your instincts for what they are and listening to them. When you develop the ability to trust your own intuition, you foster self-love. Knowing how to trust your gut is to stand in your own power and own it.
9. Regular Self Care
Self-love is much more than getting a haircut and a mani-pedi, however taking the time to respect and honor your physical body with loving gestures that make you feel good is highly recommended. Confidence and beauty do start within, but sometimes looking good can help you feel better on the inside when you are struggling with self-esteem.
10. List Your Accomplishments
Don’t be too shy to give yourself a little credit where credit is due. Write a list of everything you are proud of, whether it’s an educational or work achievement or simply learning a new recipe or deciding to master a yoga position. Big and small accomplishments are all worthy of praise, no matter what they are.
11. Practice Forgiveness
Forgiveness is vital to your mental and emotional health. Holding onto resentment towards others only hurts you in the long run. Equally, identify where you beat up on yourself for choices you regret or whatever toxic thoughts you have about your past, and then decide to let them go. Tell yourself you are just another human on a journey of life and love yourself through all your mistakes.
12. Don’t be Afraid to Say No
A lot of stress can be avoided when you realize it’s ok to say no sometimes. If you don’t feel like going out or feel overwhelmed, listen to that and take it as a sign to spend some time alone getting grounded again. You cannot please everybody and you need to make sure you are being true to yourself first.
13. Leave Your Comfort Zone
On the flip side of the above point, say yes occasionally when you normally say no. You can tell (if you’re listening to your gut) whether your ‘no’s’ are coming from a place of fear or a genuine desire not to do something. Try saying yes to something out of the ordinary for you and see how it feels to challenge yourself in new ways.
14. List Positive Traits in all Your Friends
This is a fun one to do in a couple or with a friend. Sit down together for 5 minutes and list the strong qualities and positive aspects that you each identify in the other. This can be an amazing way to bond in relationships and also has the uplifting effect of raising your own self-esteem.
15. Be Childlike
Find a photo of yourself as a child and really study it. Try to remember what that little person dreamed of, what they believed and wished for. See the innocence and light in your young eyes and find that place in you know, that place of purity and playfulness. Self-love never went away it just got pushed aside. When you remember your childlike innocence, worries seem to fade away.
You might find some of these suggestions scary at first, perhaps you shy away from some of our tips because they threaten your normal way of thinking and behaving. The bottom line is you will feel so much happier and more positive in your life if you work on developing a love for yourself.
Once you master some of the ways to create self-love you will realize how crucial it is to own who you are and shine your authentic light in the world.
Bonus Tip – Try using love to create the things you desire. For example, tell yourself that you are going to love yourself into the best version of you. Do you want a bigger house? A soul mate? A new job? A dream vacation? Love them all into existence. You can draw them, write about them, dream about them, whatever you choose, just as long as when you think of them you feel the vibration of love not lack. Love the life you desire into existence with your unfailing belief in your own magnificence.